Eulogy for Stella Ward Written by John Ward I think that when Mum was alive, if I thought about how her funeral might be, I envisaged a service, probably in All Saints’ Stamford, where the church would be full of family, friends, and, importantly, a large number of Stella’s former pupils. This has not turned out to be possible. Eldest grandson, Joe said what we were all thinking soon after Stella’s death; that he wished we could all just do for Grannie what we did for Grandpa, which was to jump on a plane and be together in England for the funeral. Stella, in her usual way of accepting what is unavoidable, and making the best of any situation, would probably say that we would have to get on with it and just spread the word in the best way we could. This is what we are doing, so please ask your friends and relatives to add something – a photo, a memory, an anecdote or anything they would like to Stella’s tribute page. And add something yourselves. When Jean contacted me to tell me that Mum had died, I called Hayley, Robyn, and Jodi. Jodi came over straight away and Hayley came up from Brisbane the following morning. Some interesting things were said about their Grannie…. “She taught me how to tie up my hair” “She loved playing Grandmother’s Footsteps” “She never complained” “She was so open-minded about so many things” “She was constantly educating herself” These are just a few thoughts from my daughters. No doubt many of us can relate closely with these thoughts. In my own mind, I think I always imagined that Mum would make it to 100. As a cricket lover this would have been significant for her. Jodi said, about this, “Missing out on some years that she could have had does not detract from the life that she did have.” Thinking about a life such as Mum’s you realise that she was a grand-daughter, daughter, sister, wife, sister in law, mother in law, godmother, mother, grandmother, aunt, great aunt, great great aunt, cousin, second cousin etc. and would soon have become a great grandmother, as one of her granddaughters, Catherine, is currently pregnant. All these relationships make for a big job and one that needs to be taken seriously. Mum took on these relationships with this simple approach: Be involved as much as you can, offer advice when it is asked for and give love without condition. Recently Stella rediscovered part of her mother’s side of her family and this had been a great delight for her, reconnecting particularly with another Stella on that side of the family, who was named after Mum. As Jean, Liz and I moved away from England, Mum’s view was that this would give her the chance to go to new places, which she did frequently, and she said to me that she had met some wonderful people and gone to destinations she would never have visited without the opportunities presented by our lives away from the UK. But time after time she would say that it was always nice to return to Stamford, because that was her home. We all have lovely memories of the house that we moved into on a stormy day in 1966. Dad bought 4, Primrose Villas at auction and was devastated that he had to go over his ceiling price by $50 to get it. The price was $5050!! Liz and I were lucky enough to have been taught at St Gilbert’s school with Mum as our teacher. Liz for one year, and I for two. When I have mentioned this to various people during my life, they have reflected that this experience must have been awkward, embarrassing, tricky, or difficult. I think that Liz would agree that it was never any of these things, and only ever felt normal and a very happy time. We were treated in exactly the same way as all the other pupils. Mum could not have encouraged any of her pupils any more than she did, so we received the same high level of encouragement as everybody else. It was a great privilege to have been taught by her and I am sure that each and every one of her former pupils, reflecting on days in Stella’s classroom, would agree. Some years ago, Mum said that she didn’t expect to see her grandchildren grow up. In fact, she lived to see all six of them into their twenties and three of these six into their thirties. This is my final thought. When getting up from a chair slightly stiffly, Mum would occasionally say, “You have to expect a few aches and pains at my age; I’m very lucky to be here.” We were all very lucky to have been here, either because of, or just at the same time as “Our Stella” for so many wonderful and love filled years.